Today's rant, and then I really should go do something productive

I only follow the NBA because I love the Sixers. I say this because it's become clear to me that it's a messed up league and if I ever have any excuse to stop following it I will probably grab that excuse and run with it. To put it another way: if you told me I'm only allowed to follow a maximum of four sports and that I would have to drop one in order to follow the new soccer team, I'd drop the NBA. I really would, which breaks my heart because, again, I love the Sixers, but it wouldn't be their fault really. They'd be the unfortunate victims here. My ire is rather directed at the league as a whole. First of all there's David Stern, who might be a literally evil man. Then there's the whole debacle with the SuperSonics, which still leaves a really bad taste in my mouth and makes me hate myself for giving the league money. And then there's this whole nonsense with everyone speculating about where LeBron James will be in 2010 - it's just offensive to me that people are more interested in what's going to happen in the league a year and a half from now than they are in watching games that are actually happening at this exact moment. But ultimately, I think my unease of late has more to do with the league's extreme and almost absurd lack of parity. Take a look at the current standings. You've got FIVE teams who are 10 or more games under .500. TEN games!!! Throw in Golden State and Memphis, each at 5-14, and that's seven teams with appallingly terrible records. Now, I know that's there's always going to be bottom-feeders and doormats in every league, but SEVEN of them? That's almost a quarter of the league. Why do these teams exist, when it's obvious that there aren't enough quality, NBA-level players to fill them? How do they take money from their fans with a straight face?

In the past, I was never one to blame expansion, partially because I have this weird, nerdy fascination with expansion teams, and the movement/addition of franchises in general, but as I've gotten older I realize that it's really the problem. (Most likely not a great idea in soccer, either, but I'm going to just ignore that for now.) I think the league would be considerably stronger if you ditched like six of these teams. A 24-team NBA would rock. But what six teams? I don't know, and unfortunately my favorite team is one of those teams currently at the bottom in attendance, so it would be pretty hypocritical of me to suggest folding, say, the Clippers, wouldn't it?

I've been grappling with the problem of the Sixers' low attendance for a while now. They didn't even sell out their playoff games back in April, which still just amazes and saddens me. I went to all three of them and it was just embarrassing seeing all those empty seats - in the playoffs! But I think, maybe, that I'm not the only one who has noticed the league's almost epic lack of parity, and most Philadelphians just didn't believe that a team like the Sixers - a good, fun team last spring, but not a real contender - had any chance against the likes of the Celtics/Lakers/Pistons, et al.

Which reminds me, take a look at those standings again. Conversely, there are teams on top like Boston, LA, and Cleveland, who are winning like 85% or more of their games, and are unbeatable to the point where you have to just kind of catch them on a bad night, and get lucky, to even have a shot. Does it really benefit the league to have a bunch of unstoppable monsters like that playing games against the doormats? Would you watch a Celtics (19-2) vs. Thunder (2-18) game? What would be the point?

Actually, the main reason I'm pissed off is because I'm still not over the fact that the Celtics were one of the league's worst teams in 2006-07, and then suddenly won the championship in 2007-08, and nobody is brave enough to stand up and say that it's obvious they got that good so quickly because they acquired one of the best players in the league from Minnesota, whose GM is Kevin McHale, a former Celtic, and if the league had any guts it would investigate the fact that it was a crappy, fake, lopsided trade and McHale was just trying to help his former team, and anyone who argues differently is a douchebag. So, yes, this entire lengthy post was just an excuse, ultimately, for me to complain about a Boston team. And you know what? It was worth it. Die, Boston, die!!!

Melodrama's so much fun, black and white for everyone... to seeeeeeee...... TO SEE.

All right, maybe Dolphin Stadium isn't necessarily "evil". Maybe the Phils are just in a kind of slump and can't score runs at the moment. Seems reasonable. I don't know if today's three runs (every one of which they had to scrape and claw for) are exactly going to snap them out of it, but it's a start. Plus the Braves and Mets lost today, so crisis averted for now.

Speaking of the Mets, I saw their score (a 5-4 loss to the D-Backs) flash on the TV and I actually laughed. I've never literally laughed at a score before. And I don't mean I did a sarcastic mean fake laugh like "Ha ha, stupid Mets", I mean I had checked that score earlier in the day and the Mets were winning 4-2 and I figured they'd hold on, and now I don't know why I thought that. The sight of yet another Mets bullpen collapse made me laugh. I hate to just blow them off because it's a long season and I'm sure they'll be a pain in my ass again at some point this year, but really, it's getting ugly over there. Ha ha, stupid Mets.

As I write this the Celtics are losing by 19 points. Now, there's been a lot of talk lately about the NBA's possible shadiness and whether their games are on the up and up, so to speak. Maybe, yeah, maybe it's in the best interest of the league for this series to go 6 or 7... but on the other hand, barring a meteor hitting the Staples Center right now, which would be the ideal scenario, the second best scenario would be Boston collapsing and losing the series in humiliating fashion. So I'm in favor of a tied series right now... no questions asked. Yes, I know the Lakers are evil and they beat us in 2001 and their star player is a rapist, but on the other hand, have I mentioned that I hate Boston? Also, I love Kareem Abdul-Jabaar because he was in Airplane!

Lakers/Celtics

Good lord... I'm not actually rooting for the Lakers, am I? I think I am. What have I become?

The thing is, though, Boston has completely beaten me down. I don't even have the energy to hate them. It's a Sisyphean task. Just when you expend the energy to hate one of their teams, another one springs out of nowhere to win another title. Who has the time? So sure, another title for the Celtics, that's fine too. I can't be bothered.