And now...

And now, some very short Quick Cuts^TM (insert this sort of odd sound effect that only I and my brother would get... ask me next time you see me):

1. I am as giddy as Giddington G. McGiddyman about the upcoming Eagles season, as all sensible red-blooded Americans are, but this T.O. business is some weak BS, people. I want you all to watch me carefully two years from now: If I ever get to be 31 years old, and spend my time acting like a four year old, you have my permission to stab me in the head with a letter opener. Shut up and play, jackass!

2. Phils are doing their typical act. For all their aggressive, lapel-grabbing mediocrity, they are still just a half game back for the wild card. Earlier this week, they actually had the lead for 24 hours. But just when you get excited about them, they suck the place up as they did last night. Weird team. Seem like nice guys, though; I hope the baseball thing works out for them.

3. The Flyers signed Peter Forsberg. Are you listening to me? I'm serious: put down your beverage, straighten up in your chair, and give me your undivided attention. Read this very carefully. Listen: the Flyers signed Peter Forsberg. The best player on the planet. If you aren't quaking in your shoes with excitement about this, then in many ways, you and I are very different people.

4. Decent chance that I will be driving cross-country in two months, to deliver my brother to his new home in LA. Pretty psyched about this... I love driving, and I tend to love journeys slightly more than destinations. If that makes sense.

4a. As a corollary to the above, I will probably, very soon, be entering the pantheon of people who own iPods. I am as stunned by this as can be, but I really want it (I don't want Jon and Matt monopolizing the music) and I think it's going to happen. About three years ago my then-ladyfriend got an iPod and I sort of made fun of her because I thought they were stupid and that she was a CD traitor. See, I love CDs. I love buying them, I love collecting them, I love how they look all together on the shelf. On the other hand, I don't really have to stop buying them, and anyway my current stereo system sucks and must die. So I should probably calm down.

5. I gave blood today, which gives me the right to sit around (it's too muggy out there anyway) and drink gallons of iced tea.

6. Right now Spoon's Gimme Fiction and the lasses' The Woods are fighting to be my current favorite record. Will they battle to the death or can they learn to coexist in peace? We shall see. Dark horses in heavy rotation: Mission of Burma, vs.; The Futureheads.

7. There's something else... nah, never mind, I'll tell you about that later.

Going to Phils/Pirates tonight. Think positive, friends. We can do this.

Ex-Phillie of the Week

Gene Mauch. Rest in peace. '64 forever!

Well, I'm back

Right now, dear reader(s), your humble Phillies diarist's life is a random jumble of only tangentially interconnected images, few of which make sense or have anything to do with the one before or after. Let me try to sum up what's been happening since the last post. I went to two Phils games (or were there more? I can't even remember), both against the Dodgers; one was a thrilling win and one was a wretched loss, which more or less sums up the Phillies experience these days. (At the risk of going off on a delusional, sleep-deprived rant I will merely shrug my theoretical blog-shoulders and just tell you that this team just isn't very good. They are 6.5 games behind the unsinkable Braves; 2.5 behind the clearly superior Astros for the wild card; their pitching is subpar; their hitting is far too inconsistent to even look at directly without shivering in the kind of raw primal terror I tend to reserve for mice, roaches, and heights; their lineup is clogged with guys like Bell and Lieberthal and Perez who are just clearly finished; their manager is thoroughly bereft of anything that could pass for an idea, even under the most generous and all-encompassing of definitions; and nobody but me seems to notice that they are 41-47 against teams not in the wretched NL West - and I refuse to see this as anything but a clear sign that, as mentioned, they just aren't very good. They're not good; I'm sorry. It needs to be said. They need wholesale changes, from the top down. I hope they prove me wrong.)

All of that said, on Friday I played softball for the first time in five years and I was just simply crappy. I went 0 for 3 (a groundout and two line drives), left something like six on base, and made the last out of the game. So perhaps I should keep my criticism of the Phils to myself until I learn how to reach first safely.

But enough about that. What else is happening in my life? The Eagles are coming to our rescue. The Flyers are back. Charlie and the Chocolate Factory is entertaining, but disposable and ultimately not worth getting tremendously excited about. The new Bob Mould album is good but has perhaps too many dance-ish touches for my taste. I saw TMBG show #21 and I saw them do "Snail Shell" for the first time since November 8, 1996. My writer's group has lately become much more interesting. I am going to Hershey Park on Thursday. And perhaps most excitingly I am on vacation this week (hence my writing this at 2:30 AM) and I am spending the next three days doing nothing but writing. I am really psyched about this. I plan on being at my desk the whole time so drop me a line at the link to the right, and wish me luck. Updates forthcoming...