Pens [very high number], Flyers [nothing whatsoever]

Rather than try to grapple with the implications of that game, let me direct you toward Phil Sheridan's thoughtful piece on the 25-year drought and the current state of Philly sports. He says everything I probably would have said, had I thought about it or put any real effort into it.

We'll see a title from at least one of them in my lifetime. I believe that.

Meanwhile, as I speak the Phils are losing to the Nats. Myers is struggling, they're stranding runners... I mean, come on guys, I've got stuff to do. I've seen this movie before. So I pulled an Irv tonight. I figure, I'm sure I'll see another Phillies game some time.

LET'S GO... oh, right. Damn.

4/3 Phils 8, Nats 7 (10 innings (10 sloppy, gutwrenching innings))

What happened: While I was at work, the Phils were showing us that it's going to be one of THOSE seasons.

Just quickly, because I have to go grocery shopping and then cook dinner: I followed most of this game from work, learning to my horror that Moyer decided to be terrible and the team committed four (4) errors (??!) in the early goings... and then just when I had decided to give up on them, they rallied, blew it, and then rallied again and won. Proving once again, you never give up on your team. Even when they commit four (4) errors (?!?!?).

I didn't actually see any of it so I will leave my commentary at that.

Next: Total sports overload tonight!!! Flyers in a huge game, Sixers in a pretty huge game, and Phils out in Cincy. Let's go for the Philly sweep.

4/2 Nats 1, Phils 0 (!); Pens 4, Flyers 2 (@*$!!?!?!)

What happened: The Phils decided to spend the first two games of the season teaching us a valuable lesson: baseball is an extremely cruel, stupid game.

Just spent an extremely frustrating evening watching the Flyers and Phils lose. The Flyers had no answers for the faster, better-goaltending Penguins; the Phils rarely hit anything and when they did it was directly and I mean directly into the gloves of the Nats' fielders. It was pretty horrendous. There's plenty of time left for the Phils, of course, but the Flyers are hanging onto that 8th seed by a thread with only two games left.

Why do I do this to myself? How many novels would I have written by now if it wasn't for sports? Would I be living in a mansion? The mind boggles.

On the plus side, Pedro Feliz had a hit, like I told you he would.

The Phils picked up veteran reliever Rudy Seanez. I'll give him the Husker Du song "Standing by the Sea", just to go with the lame pun on his name. Meanwhile, the Phils cut Wes Helms, so let's salute Wes Helms for a moment. So long Wes, I'll always remember... hmm, I can't remember anything, really. He really had the most unremarkable year here last year. I mean, I even have one or two fond memories of David Bell and Abe Nunez, for crying out loud, but none of Wes Helms.

I do remember one time Helms actually lost his shoe trying to field a ball at third. Yeah, he just... he just wasn't very good.

Next: Two more games for the Flyers, 160 for the Phils. Mark your calendars.

Wait, I said I was going to update after every game this year, didn't I? Well, fortunately, thanks to the off day, there's still time for me to not be a filthy liar.

3/31 Nats 11, Phils 6

What happened: Guess what? Our bullpen isn't good. Pedro Feliz goes 0-4 in his debut; Mayor Nutter throws the best first pitch I've ever seen.

Phils record: 0-1 (fourth place, ahead of Atlanta - ha ha!)

See, here's the thing: I'm trying to remind myself it was just one game. And of course, it was. It's just that I'm kind of an emotional panicky guy and I see things like how sloppy they looked on Monday and, well, I'm not happy. I mean, what if the pitching is really, literally that terrible? And they give up 11 runs per game every single day? Shouldn't they divest themselves of that habit immediately?

But, as usual, I need to calm down. And I have. Let me see two - hell, three! - games like that one before I start throwing swivel chairs through windows. It's just... it's just that I was really feeling a win, and I had this whole idea for a post about how great Philadelphia is because I went to John's Roast Pork before the game and it was really, really good, and I was feeling good about the whole day... I don't know, they just like to ruin my days and waste my time.

Fun fact: as far as I can determine that was the first ever regular season game played in Pennsylvania in the month of March - that was our first one, and the Pirates have never had one, and they never played this early back in the days of the A's. Ruminate on that tonight while you're trying to fall asleep.

Next: Hollywood Hamels makes his season debut. I predict a hit from Feliz, and the bullpen calms down.