On Sunday, for the first time since April 8, 1981, and for only the second time in human history, the Phillies will take the field on Opening Day as defending World Series champions.

That sound you just heard was me flinging a chair across the room in excitement.

And now I'd like to apologize for using the very lame and tired "that sound you just heard" trope, which is second only to "there is no truth to the rumor that" on the list of incredibly bad, hacky, unfunny cliches used by terrible sportswriters.

Anyway, I hadn't thought about Opening Day or even the season much until very recently, because I've been busy with other things, following other sports, working, and so on, plus the Phillies are in the very interesting position of still being really good, so I haven't had to spend the offseason worrying about how terrible they're going to be. I'm quite confident that they aren't going to be terrible at all. Confidence is a wonderful, liberating thing, you should try it some time.

The lineup, I'm not worried about the lineup just yet. The starters look okay, especially Blanton - who knew? The bullpen should be solid. They have plenty of decent options for the bench. There you go, I just described a very good baseball team. The NL is up for grabs, and the AL is filed with overrated scumbags. One thing leads to another, and I get to take another day off for a parade, and buy another 8-disc World Series DVD box set. Accolades all around!

So, here are my problems with the World Baseball Classic:
1. In theory, I wouldn't mind rooting for the US team, but it's filled with guys like Chipper Jones and Kevin Youkilis and David Wright, men who I literally refuse to root for in any situation - I don't care that we were born on the same landmass within the same political divisions, it isn't going to happen.
2. The WBC uses the same idiotic, fake-baseball extra innings rules that they use in the Olympics, plus they have a "mercy rule". Mercy rule. What is this, Little League? If you're down 10-0, you take it like a man. Brush a guy back or something. Come on, South Africa, grow a set.
3. One other observation, but I have to take a shower and go to work. Back in a bit.

Hey look, I'm in the paper.

Meanwhile, I've think I've found a kind of end-around for the writer's block which I've had for a few weeks and have diligently and unsuccessfully tried to ignore: I'm going to abandon that one thing, and try writing something else.

It's so crazy, it just might work.

More soon, I hope.

(Also: I never update this blog... so why, I ask, am I seriously considering starting another one, devoted to the soccer team? Is that just stupid?)