Weblog Post, 28 August 2007: IN WHICH the Phillies score nine runs to the Mets' two, Adam Eaton is the world's most important person right now, and I leave for El Pueblo de Nuestra Señora la Reina de los Ángeles del Río de Porciúncula

I gotta tell you, Phillies, that was pretty clutch. Keep that up. Utley and Werth looked great and Durbin is my boy. Tonight's game is the linchpin: struggling Adam Eaton vs. fresh-faced rookie Tom Glavine. If Eaton pitches well, we're in for a good September, mark my words. I believe in him, don't you?

Tonight I embark on my journey to Los Angeles, so updates will be even more sporadic than usual. For those you here at home, take care of the Phils for me while I'm gone, will you? I hope to put up some pictures, updates etc. while I'm there, just like the November '05 trip, and you remember that one right? Please send all comments and questions to the email address to your right, or in the comments sections. Not every question can be answered, but every one will be read.

You'd like to believe, but...

The Phils are 1-3 already on the Really Important Homestand. They just simply have really bad pitching, have had it all along, and it's starting to catch up with them. Moyer has chosen this week to go into a wretched slump, Mesa appears to be finally, literally finished, and they're using guys like Sanches who just aren't major league pitchers. (He's really terrible.) Oh, and the offense has completely flatlined and they're playing like idiots. All of this results in games like last night's, in which they sleepwalked to a 14-3 loss - this coming 48 hours after sleepwalking to a 13-3 loss. How do you get blown out that bad twice in three days? By being terrible. Ergo, I'm not so sure I believe in them anymore. I really hate saying that, I sound like a jerk. But they make disappointment so startlingly easy. They need to win six straight just to avoid getting buried...

This week's homestand against the Dodgers, Padres, and Mets is the single most important event in the history of human civilization.

And I'm ashamed to say I'm going to miss the tail end of it, the crucial games against the Mets, because a week from today I'm leaving to spend a week in Jerktown, USA, also known by its actual, non-fictional name Los Angeles. I'm really amped, stoked if you will, about my impending vacation, but I really feel like I need to be here for the guys! Well, in my more deranged moments, I think that. Realistically speaking they'll probably be the same either way.

I went to Sunday's game in Pittsburgh and it was a total disaster. But then I went to tonight's game, a fine win, and I feel a little better. We're tied for the wild card again, but I would rather that the Padres had beaten the Mets. It's like this: I would be more than happy - ecstatic, really - if the Phils won the wild card. That would be unbelievably great. But, having said that, it's so important for me to see the Phils win the division, and as long as that's still possible, that's what I'm going to root for. It's kind of like something Andrew told me once - you'll have to ask him to explain it better - but basically, he felt that because he had waited his whole life to see the Eagles get into the Super Bowl, once they finally got there, in many ways the fact that they were there at all was more important than the outcome of the game. For me, I've been watching Atlanta (and New York, last year) win the division year after year after year... all I want is to see the Phils do it. That's what I want, and by god I'm going to have it. Therefore I'm not going to worry about the wild card until I absolutely have to.

Hamels will miss his start tomorrow. I kind of don't even want to talk about it. Andrew left me a voice mail about it, but I can't even bring myself to call back just yet. Let me get some sleep first.

NO!

Well, Adam Eaton didn't win it for Marta. He didn't win it for anybody! He's worse than bad at this point, he's a liability. He's actively hurting the team simply by being in the game. I mean he just simply can't pitch right now. Now, you keep hearing conflicting things - the Phils' official line is that he's still in the rotation, and generally, the Phils like to keep playing guys who are making giant piles of money. But really, how much longer can they keep trotting him out there? Manuel has shown a propensity to bench high-paid players who suck (Helms, Barajas, et al.) so I have to think they're going to do something. We're in a pennant race. Legitimately so. (With a win last night, the Phils would have been two back for the division and tied for the safety school.) They should try Durbin again. Hell, at this point I'd try J.A. Happ again. How can anyone be worse than Eaton right now?

Goin' through soft core mutations

The other day I discovered that the Phils are keeping pace with their 1980 counterparts and that's still more or less the case: right now they're only one game behind their title-winning ancestors. They're playing pretty great right now - not perfect, but they've been hanging in there all season, overcoming injuries, bad pitching, and general stupidity, and they've played reasonably well against the Braves and Mets, neither of whom strike me as being as scary as years past. We can do this. A series win this weekend would be sweet. The world's most loathsome scumbag, Scott Olsen, having a good game tonight against the Mets would be extra sweet. Sweetness abounds! Adam Eaton, seriously, are you reading this? Get it together tonight. Also, Rowand left last night's game early with "blurred vision". Please just stick a contact lens in that guy and get him back out there. A gruesomely shattered nose didn't stop him, why should some nebulous eye problem?

I was reminded that the Premiership starts this weekend. Best of luck to my adopted side, Reading. I know absolutely nothing about their history, fandom, and I can't name more than like two of their players. But we all need a favorite English football team, don't you think? Reading's first "fixture" (what the hell, England?) is tomorrow against Man U in Old Trafford. Oh, I'm sure they'll be fine.

Actual, real football starts on Monday with the Birds' first preseason game. The preseason blows and I can't concentrate on football right now while the Phils are still good, so the Eagles will have to muddle through the next month without me. I'll be there in September, boys, don't worry.

I'd like to send a shout out to one of my best and oldest friends in the world, Marta B., who turns 30 today. You hear that, Adam Eaton? You gotta win this one for Marta. Do me this one favor, buddy. I'm behind you.

I think I'm gonna go buy a sandwich now.

A picture of Luna for no obvious reason

The posting problems from earlier this week appear to be over, and the "lost post" from Sunday morning has returned. In retrospect, Adam Eaton did not, in fact, get it together, but they won anyway in a thriller that I completely did not see. Meanwhile, the gang have won three in a row, the last two in the uninhabitable swamp that Philly has disgustingly become. As I write this, we're 60-53, the exact same record that the 1980 Phils were after 113 games. (Interestingly, that's the worst record at this point in the season of the eight Phillies teams that made the postseason.) What does it mean? Not much, probably, but the point is they're playing very well and I'm optimistic. As I said before, the Phils have run into a lot of bad luck in recent years - will everything break our way this time? Just once? We're four games out of the division, two out of the wild card (or as I call it, the "safety school"). One more against the Fish tomorrow. Big series against Pure Evil this weekend. Should be fun.

Thanks to the Mets' apparent insistence on not being as good as last year, the Phils are still in the race. I am so glad I missed last night's game - it sounds like it was a total punch in the stomach. Gordon worries me, but by all accounts the one pitch was his only mistake. Otherwise it sounds like the Phils did everything they could to actually win it, proving once again that despite the hard time that the players, coaches, manager, front office, and owners have received over the years, the Phils' difficulty in reaching the postseason has probably been as much due to bad luck as anything else. When are we going to get some breaks? Why do we have to lose so many good players to injury in such a short time? Speaking of which, were I the Phillies (and I'm not), I'd try to come up with a better outfield solution than Chris Roberson, who appears to be one of the worst hitters I've ever seen (and mind you, in recent years I've been subjected to Endy Chavez, Alex Gonzalez, Abe Nunez, Sal Fasano, and Rod Barajas). Roberson went 0-5 in both of his last two starts. Oh, and he's never, ever walked in 61 career plate appearances. Never. In a related story, Manuel has him leading off (?!?!?).And then there's today's starter, Adam Eaton. The man just isn't getting it done right now and he's starting to frighten me. I would really, really like to avoid a sweep, Adam, are you listening? Get it together!